Baby Steps

It's the baby steps that make the journey right? At least, that is what I have been told. I understand that nothing comes overnight, but sometimes the slowness of it all just kills me. In 1 year I have gained more weight than I thought possible, now while it took me 1 year to put it on, I am so bummed that after a week it isn't falling off. LOL.. ridiculous I know but I am just so disappointed. Most of all, how in the world do I learn to control my eating habits. I do good for a day, then it all goes down hill. Then I get upset at myself for not sticking to it so I eat more. A viscious cycle. But I am not giving up. I am praying to God to help me through this, I know He can. So for now, I am praying and taking baby steps. I can't change overnight.

Time for some changes

Lately I have felt that I am just not good enough, I am gaining weight and my marriage seems to be drifting into a dangerous, unkown place. For the last month I have felt helpless to stop any of it. But after praying it out I am on a mission to change it. On Valentine's Day Jason and I watched Fireproof, it was fantastic and really helped me see that marriage isn't always about love. It's about choices, it is the choice to hold your tongue when you are angry. It is a choice to show your love, even when you are frustrated. In order to make our marriage solid, we have to change the choices we are currently making. They talked about a book "The Love Dare" in the movie and I really think I may get that book. It is a day by day, step by step guide to help you re-learn how to treat your spouse.

I also started back at the gym. My committment to myself is at least 3 days a week I will work out. I have to feel better about myself, and in order for me to do that I have to lose some weight. I am hoping not only will I lose some weight by working out, but I hope to relieve some of my stress as well. Funny how the older you get the harder it is to focus on yourself? We have got to re-train ourselves not to do that!